Disappointment is My Favorite Flavor

Well, I got bounced out of the OMS running. There is always next year. C'est la vie!

FSOT in October. This time, with feeling.

MCAS, betch!

Another step forward. This ho done passed her MCAS in Word 2007. THUG LIFE. Now, hopefully, in two months, I will get news I want to hear from the State Department about being invited to the Oral Assessment for the FSS-OMS position.

Fingers crossed. Toes crossed. Cat's tail knotted and crossed. MEOW!

Foreign Service Specialist?

Well, I'm still vying for the FS after all. Right after I got my sad news from BEX about my FSO candidacy being shut down, I threw in an application to the Foreign Service Specialist -- Office Management Specialist field.

Basically, the FSS role is the day to day support of US Embassies. They are people who do IT work, HR, Office Management, Doctorin', etc. They aren't diplomats, but they are there in support of the US mission. They get to travel and do the good work, just in a different capacity. So I thought--why the hell not? And happily, I actually have more academic credentials than needed for the position, and some experience that I think translates into Office work.

OMS used to be referred to as FS-Secretary. I'm glad the title has changed! Secretary doesn't really describe what OMS workers do. It's more of a "My Man (or Woman) Friday" role than typist, which is what the word "secretary" makes me think of. I can do this. I can be someone's "Manservant Hecubus." See Kids in the Hall for the reference.

Anyway, I applied. And yesterday, they got back to me--they want to see my MCAS certification in Word 2007! I know it's just a small step forward, but at least they weren't like "GTFO!" or "Who the F do you think you are?" Those aren't my favorite reactions from people/potential employers. I guess I just have to go ahead and get the MCAS now. Hmm. Good thing I already know Word pretty well. Time to study! Thundercats are GO!

In other news, PAE also said I might be a potential match for some of their Embassy Support positions in Moscow/Beijing. And I've been applying for jobs in Kuwait, Djibouti, etc. One of these days, something amazing is going to happen. I just know it.

Breaking news: Ms. Saffy Monsoon is definitely up for an adventure. Yeah, big surprise there.

The Foreign Service is my ultimate goal. Be it as an FSO or an FSS, that is what I absolutely, most definitely want. The moment either of those things become a reality... well, I'd be beyond happy. In the meantime, however, I want to get some international experience. I'm young. I have no husband. I have no children. I should do this. I've talked about it my whole life, so I might as well just work like a dervish and make it happen. It's time to turn dreams into reality.

Don't Give Up

Well, I heard back from the lovely BEX contingent with my QEP Results.

Do not pass go, do not collect $500.

Needless to say, I am disappointed. I had hopes. I know it is not arbitrary, but based on the anecdotal evidence on the Yahoo forums--it certainly seems that way. At any rate, I'm going to retake the FSOT in October, and I'm going to start the process over. If it's as arbitrary as it feels, I could very well be arbitrarily selected next time around!

I may rethink my cone decision however. I had picked the Consular cone, but Public Diplomacy (which is a "tougher" cone to get into) feels like a good fit as well. It seems to play more to my talents and experience, while Consular works with my aspirations to work hard and fight the good fight in the trenches of Diplomacy. Ah well. I have about six months to see how I feel.

In the meantime, I'm going to begin studying French, and I'm going to try to be more active in the community... It's time to get my life a little more in order. Things are better in January 2010 than they were in January 2009. I am not without hope that things will get better. They're already pretty good.

As I learned in X-Files: I Want to Believe--Don't Give Up.

There is always hope. There is always a chance. And hell--at least I know more about the FS than I did before I started this process. I already know that I'm capable of passing the FSOT, and that's definitely an important hurdle.

Harder. Better. Faster. Stronger.

Don't Give Up.

Tryptophan Haze

It was a beautiful day for Thanksgiving. The air was cool, and the sun was shining. A perfect fall day. The turkey came out well--I have never made turkey before, so it was an adventure--especially since I couldn't find an actual bird to roast. I ended up throwing two turkey breast tenderloins in a crockpot (with some white wine, sliced granny smith apple, leeks, rosemary, thyme, and lemon juice), and to my relief, it was tasty. The stuffing was fine (though I have a ridiculous amount of it left--good thing it's my favorite dish at T-giving!), as were my brussels sprouts. Thank goodness. The last thing I wanted was a terrible dinner. Especially since I only have my illustrious companion kitty, to help me eat it.

I wish I had been able to spend the day with my parents--but they live far away. I don't have any other family, and after a disastrous T-giving last year, I've made it a policy to not accept invitations.

So, a lonely Turkey Day... but a peaceful one, which I can fully support.

FSOT Score Breakdown

Last Friday, I submitted my FSOT Score Breakdown Request. Today, the much-anticipated breakdown came in the mail. Here are the results:

Job Knowledge: 64.29
Biographic Info: 55.29
English Expression: 59.35

Total: 178.93

Essay: 10

I'm happy with these results. The essay is where I hoped it would be (at a minimum, admittedly), and my Bio score is much more solid than I had anticipated. My JK and EE should be reversed in my opinion, but hey--I didn't score the test! No one really knows precisely how the T-scores are determined, or what the test is potentially "out of." It's a mystery for the ages. All I know is this: a minimum T-score of 154 is required for the essay to be scored, and a minimum essay score of 6 is required to pass.

The essay is out of a possible 12 points, however.

Anyway, I just wanted to document this step in my journey. On Tuesday, the PNQs are due for QEP review. I hope you like all of these TLAs, because if this FSO dream comes true, they will become more frequent. But that event, however, is TBD.

How and Why the FS?

I'll admit, I haven't always known about the Foreign Service. I mean, I knew what a diplomat was--I've lived overseas, and I knew about embassies and all that jazz. However, I didn't know about the Foreign Service as an institution.

My academic background is solidly within the humanities, and my career field has little to do with travel and government shenanigans. I guess you could say that aside from my overseas experience and what I've seen in the news, it simply hasn't come up. The one thing I've always maintained in life is that I'd like to do something meaningful and useful, and I'd like to travel.

And so. I finished my MA in May, and I was without employment. But one day, while I was loafing on the couch (I won't pretend I was more active than that at that particular moment), my phone rang. It was my Dad, and he was calling me in the middle of his workday. He was excited. Very excited. He'd seen something in the newspaper, and it just couldn't wait.

"There's an ad in the paper! They're having some kind of informational session up at the UW about the Foreign Service. The blurb says they're recruiting."

My reaction was... well, not one of total excitement. I was interested, but I didn't even know what the Foreign Service was, and based on my education, I wasn't convinced I was eligible for government work. I told Dad that it seemed great, but that I was probably unqualified.

My Dad, ever the optimist, always my biggest fan: "You're qualified for everything you want to do. You should look this up. There's a website--go to it. Besides, the ad says they're having a hiring surge. This could be your shot."

If Dad had had his way that day, I would have registered right then for the June FSOT. But fortunately, I humored him, and I went to the State Department website like a dutiful daughter. I read the job description. More significantly, I read the requirements. US Citizen--check. At least 20 years of age--check. And, that was pretty much it. I was astonished. I had not thought a girl with an English degree could have job like that.

But apparently, I could. I read the State Department website backward and forward. I read about all the FS jobs. I read about all of the Cones (career tracks) in the FS. I took the quiz to see where I matched up. Consular. A clear choice for me. I started reading FS blogs and Googling and Googling everything I could. I bought the official test book.

Unfortunately, I couldn't register for the test right away. I was in transition, and I wasn't sure where I'd be living by the end of the summer--or by the end of the month. So I just kept reading the materials. I bought some books to review for the FSOT, and I pondered this potential path.

A long path. A rigorous one. The odds weren't good. But. As my Dad would say, there's no way to get what I want in life if I never try.

I guess the question remains: Why? Why was I so thunderstruck?

Sure, the travel is always a factor. I'm a rebel, and living in Bishkek sounds pretty sweet to me. It's really much more than that, however. The FS would allow me to do something meaningful with my life. If I were in Consular services, I'd adjudicate visas--people would either be happy or upset by my decisions. The right people would enter our country, and hopefully, the wrong people would be kept out. Critical! If I worked with AmCits, I'd help people who got in over their heads while overseas.

In fact, it was in reading the Consular Cone stuff on the State Department website that I realized AmCit services played a critical role in my life at one point. When I was a little girl, my mother and I were evacuated from Riyadh (twice) during the Persian Gulf War. It became clear that it would have been the US Embassy that made this happen. It was kind of a DUH moment for me, but it also made me feel like I could do something to reciprocate this. I had been helped--why not help others? Hell, based on was the website said, I was qualified anyway.

So you see, it wasn't just a spur of the moment thing. I thought about it. Between the time I was informed of the FS' existence by my Dad and when I finally registered for the exam, it had been a few months. It never left my mind. It was simply one of those moments where I thought: "This is what I want."

I hope it happens. I'm trying!

Let me tell you, it felt damn good to pass the FSOT. I know it's the lowest of the hurdles, and that I could be shot down like a SCUD missile by the QEP, but at least I know I can make it this far. I just keep thinking to myself: I can do this. I am qualified.

And my Dad and my Mom are rooting for me. Good enough.